Addiction
To my dearest friend,
I don’t know how to say this but I got to let you go. You have been here for me for many years. But you see, I have a daughter now and a real life. I have a good life. God has been a bigger and better friend to me than you can ever be. I think it is time to make God and my family the first priority in my life. You were there to get me through the hard times. When my father was on drugs. When I felt lonely. When I was sad. When I hurt. You were there. Because you have always been there to take away the pain and heart ache I felt like I should never turn my back on you. I love you and I have loved you for a long time. But you know there is a time for everything. I feel like you have been very selfish you have taken all my time. Since I have allowed you back in my life I have tried to defend you but.. Its painfully obvious that your not a good friend. You are to needy and clingy. I have to report to you everyday. Then once I report to you then you call me back 30 min later wanting me to pick you up again. I cant take you in public or you will get me in trouble. I cant tell anyone about you because then I will be judged and the whole world will wonder why im friends with you. im sorry your not my friend and I actually hate you I don’t love you I despise you. I wont let you control me any more. You have abused my soul so many times and I keep letting you back in my life over and over. Well no more back sliding no more in and out of my life. People said the you were something that I could use… something I could go back and forth to… they said you wouldn’t hurt me…. Now look, you have poisoned me, my mind, my eyes are red and my head is cloudy. You’re not my friend God didn’t send you. Im going to have to leave you with Satan. that’s why today im having a funeral for you and im telling you bye I will never see you again. Its obvious you will never change and so that is why I have to change. I have given you so many chances saying this time will be different. This time you wont control me. This time I will only see you on the weekends. But now I see you will never change. You’re a bully you want all of me you don’t want to share me. If I don’t let you go today once and for all bad things can happen to me. Also I have realized I don’t need you. God has given me everything I need to make it. Now its up to me to make it. So me and you are breaking up and I no longer want to be friends with you. So today I cut you off. I start by cutting off your roots and I end at the head of your sweet little torso. And your gone done forever, bye.. When you see me no need to speak, I hope to never see your face again or smell your presents but the truth is I know I will, but the next time, I wont speak to you. I will avoid you and never look u in the eye again. I will never give you respect again. You are not what that is. You are what that was. You belong to Satan now. And I belong to God so have a nice life without me because I close the chapter.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Food for thought
Food for thought
What do you think about this? Let me start off telling you what I think.
At first, I was a little spectacle. I thought who is this Quack and what the hell is he talking about. Growing gardens in your balcony. What? But you know what this man really does speak the truth. Society is going to have to step it up and stop relying on the government or the system, (as I call it), to do what is right for the people. Today’s industries are designed to do one thing, make money. But what does that mean for the people who are spending more money. In some cases like mine I am spending more money than I can make. Once my paycheck hit’s the bank I’m dispersing it all out to bills and gas.
My parents raised me on a farm. I grew up surrounded by pigs, chickens, ducks cows, emus and last but not least a garden. You name it we had it or tried it. When I was a child I knew nothing else. But when I got older I moved to the city and telling people about my farming experience was almost cliché. I didn’t know any other black farmers and when I said anything about animals people were like …ewe pigs stink and etc. No one was really accepting of the idea to say the least. For that reason I shied away from my upbringing and tried to adopt the city into my veins. But as I’ve grown into my own ideas, I see that most of what my parents have taught me was reality at its best. For instance, My father always said “ as long as you have animals and a garden you will always eat” he also said “If you get a business get one that if society goes into a depression they will still need your products”. let me tell you how this applies.
I went to the groceries store today and chicken is six to seven dollars . Not just any chicken, over processed , injected, spruced up chickens. Milk is 4 dollars a gallon and half the nation is lactose intolerant due to all the extra crap that is added and subtracted (so that the milk doesn’t go bad). Beef we wont even talk about beef because most of it you cant even afford anymore. One pack of steak can run you 14 dollar and then there is not enough to feed your family. Do you see where I am going ? If not I could talk about the eggs that are painted and injected . Or the pork that is so salted and so fattening that you cant eat it without signing up high blood pressure. Vegetables equal pesticides. And ill just stop there in effort not to bore you. But really, I ask you, is this what you want to feed your children or yourself ? Me? No.
With that being said we have to wake up and start having our own minds. We need to grow our own fresh vegetable . Try raising a cow or a pig if you have the land. Any body can do something to preserve their life. If you are ultra citified grow a small garden or start out with one chicken. The results. You will have food that actually tastes like food . And your pockets will be filled with that green stuff we call money. You can actually start your own business. And people will always need your products.
My final comment is this. This world as we know it is dwindling down to nothing . Global warming, fires, tsunamis, tornadoes, hurricanes. The governments response recycle, go green , less pollution. At one point in time we were told to drink bottled water. Now they tell us the plastic used for bottled water can cause cancer and that it causes more pollution because bottles are not properly disposed of. We may not be able to save the earth but we can save ourselves and our families. I don’t think we can sit around and wait for the next big fad to save our selves we have to look to ourselves and our ancestors. Maybe the last generation was a dumb as we thought …hum. That’s food for thought. Until next time.
What do you think about this? Let me start off telling you what I think.
At first, I was a little spectacle. I thought who is this Quack and what the hell is he talking about. Growing gardens in your balcony. What? But you know what this man really does speak the truth. Society is going to have to step it up and stop relying on the government or the system, (as I call it), to do what is right for the people. Today’s industries are designed to do one thing, make money. But what does that mean for the people who are spending more money. In some cases like mine I am spending more money than I can make. Once my paycheck hit’s the bank I’m dispersing it all out to bills and gas.
My parents raised me on a farm. I grew up surrounded by pigs, chickens, ducks cows, emus and last but not least a garden. You name it we had it or tried it. When I was a child I knew nothing else. But when I got older I moved to the city and telling people about my farming experience was almost cliché. I didn’t know any other black farmers and when I said anything about animals people were like …ewe pigs stink and etc. No one was really accepting of the idea to say the least. For that reason I shied away from my upbringing and tried to adopt the city into my veins. But as I’ve grown into my own ideas, I see that most of what my parents have taught me was reality at its best. For instance, My father always said “ as long as you have animals and a garden you will always eat” he also said “If you get a business get one that if society goes into a depression they will still need your products”. let me tell you how this applies.
I went to the groceries store today and chicken is six to seven dollars . Not just any chicken, over processed , injected, spruced up chickens. Milk is 4 dollars a gallon and half the nation is lactose intolerant due to all the extra crap that is added and subtracted (so that the milk doesn’t go bad). Beef we wont even talk about beef because most of it you cant even afford anymore. One pack of steak can run you 14 dollar and then there is not enough to feed your family. Do you see where I am going ? If not I could talk about the eggs that are painted and injected . Or the pork that is so salted and so fattening that you cant eat it without signing up high blood pressure. Vegetables equal pesticides. And ill just stop there in effort not to bore you. But really, I ask you, is this what you want to feed your children or yourself ? Me? No.
With that being said we have to wake up and start having our own minds. We need to grow our own fresh vegetable . Try raising a cow or a pig if you have the land. Any body can do something to preserve their life. If you are ultra citified grow a small garden or start out with one chicken. The results. You will have food that actually tastes like food . And your pockets will be filled with that green stuff we call money. You can actually start your own business. And people will always need your products.
My final comment is this. This world as we know it is dwindling down to nothing . Global warming, fires, tsunamis, tornadoes, hurricanes. The governments response recycle, go green , less pollution. At one point in time we were told to drink bottled water. Now they tell us the plastic used for bottled water can cause cancer and that it causes more pollution because bottles are not properly disposed of. We may not be able to save the earth but we can save ourselves and our families. I don’t think we can sit around and wait for the next big fad to save our selves we have to look to ourselves and our ancestors. Maybe the last generation was a dumb as we thought …hum. That’s food for thought. Until next time.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Appreciate what you have !!"
I'm sure any one reading this will say " Of course I appreciate what I have." But do we really? By saying we, I do mean (you and me). You know every morning I wake up and say "uuhhh... I don't want to go to work today, I hate my job." But, what if I didn't have a job to wake up to. I complain about my car and how I wish I could get a new one. What If didn't have a car to drive? I complain because I want a bigger house. What if I didn't have a home to go too? The list goes on and on. Groceries are to high. Child support is always late. Why can't I get a good man? Then when I get one I think why cant he be like this or that man? Why is daycare so high? Why is college so expensive. Get my drift. Hmm, does this sound familiar? Well let me tell you a little something. I always felt like I should stop complaining and and be appreciative. I read self help books,I prayed and I did everything but stopped complaining. But God knows me very well. He got my attention in a way that hit home.
One morning I got up went to work my supervisor of 3 years got fired. This took away my security, my cushion. All of a sudden, I had new responsibilities, a new supervisor and my job good rough. And for the first time in 4 years I felt like I could possibly lose my job. "Whaaat not me I thought.. I'm to good for that". Then the next day I woke up to take my finals, (in which I needed to bring up my grade because I slacked off all semester) and my car got repossessed. WHaaat aw hell naw uh uh now hold on. I know this must be a mistake. I got finals in 30 minutes and I gotta find a ride now, I thought. OK then I finished the semester and find out I cant go to school summer semester because I don't have enough money. ok ok fine but then my child support doesn't come in at all for 3 weeks. I still didn't learn my lesson becauseI was to busy being cocky "I thought oh well i get a rebate check in a week and ill be straightened back out can't nobody hold me down." Not to mention since I didn't have child support I was late on daycare, I was making payment arrangements on my electricity and phone bill. Every day I waited by the mail or checked the IRS website in hopes some money was coming in some where. Just to find out I wasn't getting a refund check until a month later.
Finally, I realized something GOD is trying to tell me something. I have been a ungrateful, unappreciative, brat. Instead of thanking God for everything I had and every breath I took I damned my blessings, cursed them and treated my life like it was cursed. But all in one week everything I had was stripped away from me.I realized that God wanted me to appreciate what I had. I can truly say I'm now thankful and slowly everything is coming back to me. Another thing I realized I was cocky I felt like i did everything myself. I never took time to give God the glory. It was all about me me me. So if this sounds in anyway familiar wake up before your picking yourself back up and wondering what just happened.And thank God for everything you have.Stop complaining about what you want to have. Stop complaining about how u wish it could be. And realize how lucky u really are. I do, even with all my short comings. I get ot of bed everyday and say thank you lord for this new day. Thank you for my great job.This job provides me with a income. Thank you for this car that gets me to and from. Thank Lord for this meal, I couldnt imagine not having anything to eat.
One morning I got up went to work my supervisor of 3 years got fired. This took away my security, my cushion. All of a sudden, I had new responsibilities, a new supervisor and my job good rough. And for the first time in 4 years I felt like I could possibly lose my job. "Whaaat not me I thought.. I'm to good for that". Then the next day I woke up to take my finals, (in which I needed to bring up my grade because I slacked off all semester) and my car got repossessed. WHaaat aw hell naw uh uh now hold on. I know this must be a mistake. I got finals in 30 minutes and I gotta find a ride now, I thought. OK then I finished the semester and find out I cant go to school summer semester because I don't have enough money. ok ok fine but then my child support doesn't come in at all for 3 weeks. I still didn't learn my lesson becauseI was to busy being cocky "I thought oh well i get a rebate check in a week and ill be straightened back out can't nobody hold me down." Not to mention since I didn't have child support I was late on daycare, I was making payment arrangements on my electricity and phone bill. Every day I waited by the mail or checked the IRS website in hopes some money was coming in some where. Just to find out I wasn't getting a refund check until a month later.
Finally, I realized something GOD is trying to tell me something. I have been a ungrateful, unappreciative, brat. Instead of thanking God for everything I had and every breath I took I damned my blessings, cursed them and treated my life like it was cursed. But all in one week everything I had was stripped away from me.I realized that God wanted me to appreciate what I had. I can truly say I'm now thankful and slowly everything is coming back to me. Another thing I realized I was cocky I felt like i did everything myself. I never took time to give God the glory. It was all about me me me. So if this sounds in anyway familiar wake up before your picking yourself back up and wondering what just happened.And thank God for everything you have.Stop complaining about what you want to have. Stop complaining about how u wish it could be. And realize how lucky u really are. I do, even with all my short comings. I get ot of bed everyday and say thank you lord for this new day. Thank you for my great job.This job provides me with a income. Thank you for this car that gets me to and from. Thank Lord for this meal, I couldnt imagine not having anything to eat.
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